=)=

Wednesday, June 06, 2012 @ 20:53

Hello bessie; (PS, I want to change your name to Betty. Or Becky.)

It's that time of the year, where everyone will remember that I'm still existing, that I'm still alive (but I'm barely breathing.), that I'm still living my life out even though many people didn't agree I would make it do far. (There was a time, when people said that YJ couldn't make it, but he did.). Yups, I'm talking about that time when I turn a year older, my birthday.

It's kinda customary I think to write down one's birthday wishes, so I shall write down my birthday wish ala my little sister Shahida kotex.

Honestly speaking, I don't really need anything. Whatever I need, I have the... Resources to get it myself so as to speak. Besides, I don't really expect anything from anyone. I've went 7 years without celebrating my birthday with anyone. Everyone is too busy with their own lives to care honestly speaking. I started expecting people to celebrate with me at first, but I gave up hope after people kept disappointing me year after year. Expectations leads to hope, hope to disappointment after all. I've spent the last 3 years spending my birthday sleeping the whole day at home. If I have no plans, might as well spend it sleeping right?

But I seriously digress. I have this bad habit. K... So... If birthday wishes do come true, then I write these wishes down in hopes that it will come true on 28th June 2012...

1) A message from you, my ex. No matter what you say or how you act or how you treat me, I'll never bring myself to hate you. I can't. Who can honestly speaking. All I wish for is that we can be friends again. And of course, I wish nothing but the best for you.

2) I wish someone will send me a card thru snail mail. I know it might seem old fashioned to some, or even antique to those who didn't receive such things before. But there's a certain joy in opening up your letter box and finding a card inside with your name when it's usually just bills bills and more bills. I don't know, maybe I'm just weird. I don't think I'm going to post my address. Later loan sharks come and splash paint how?

3) I really just want to meet my skyians again. They have been an important part of my life since I first started work at Sentosa 2.5 years ago. They taught me so much, and I in turn learned so much from them. They have been my colleagues, my friends and my family. They were the ones who help me thru the darkest period of my life when my mother was sick, they were the ones who supported me when I couldn't even look after myself. They were the ones who made time to come when my grandfather passed away early this year... No matter what has happened between us, they are still my family. And family forgive each other for what they do to each other at that point of time.

4) Actually, why not I just meet up with all my friends, sec, jc, army, ex colleagues and current colleagues. I already know I'm going to get sabo-ed on the 27th since my AM shift suddenly changed to a PM shift... Confirm get sabo one. Can we just do without the sabo-ing, sit down somewhere and catch up with each other's life??

5)... I don't really not what else to wish for. I don't dare to wish for much. In fact, posting this post already shows that I'm expecting it to come true, it's just going to lead to disappointment again... =/ but oh well... I get a birthday wish a year, I always use it for others. And I know I'm going to use it on someone this year again. Because st the end of the day, that's me. I don't mind getting the short end of the stick if my friends are happier for it.

I think that's about it. I shan't write anymore, let's just see what happens in 9 days time.